R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
