I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize
