its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
