just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
