I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Sorry about my life...
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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