I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
