just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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