the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
