and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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