I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
