SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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