They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
