Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
