How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize