wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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