All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
