Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
