McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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