i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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