You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
