i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
