week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
