she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
