Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I think people are normalizing furries
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
