Midget sex pt 2 tonight
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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