In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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