i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize