Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
