She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
she told me i tasted like america
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
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