You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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