i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
