Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
