the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
