is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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