The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Dignity is for republicans.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I have tasted many bathrooms
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
