I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Randomize