I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
smell my finger.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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