marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
