I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Even my vagina gasped.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
