Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
