Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Come see our sink grown plant.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
