He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
