At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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