I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
