What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
