youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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