North Korea, Best Korea!
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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