is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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