By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
