yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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